As @bravenel mentioned, the best way to get instant status update is with a switch that utilizes that patent.
Alternatively, if you really truly aren’t using this to physically control current to any devices and you’re just using them to run apps, hello home actions, and change modes, then you don’t need a dimmer switch at all, you can just use button controller. That can give you instant status update without violating the lutron patent because that patent applies only to light switches.
The options then are a wallmount tablet using a dashboard app, a minimote, or a button controller like the SmartenIT. None of these count as light switches, so you can get immediate update.
All of that said, though, I’d still start with repeating a zwave repair 3 times. The fact that it’s working one way (hub to switch) and not the other (switch to hub) could just be status reporting as @bravenel mentioned, or could be an orphaned node. The hub knows to go directly to the switch, but the switch may be trying to reach a neighbor that is no longer in range.
And with that many devices, you certainly have some hops in your network, so a repeated repair can only improve things.