My wife is completely indifferent to the whole thing, but we’ve had serious and more involved home automation setups before, which have evolved over time – we used to use MisterHouse (written in PERL) with X10, and it would announce who was calling on the phone and when favorite shows were about to start on TV, so the move into SmartThings hasn’t really been as impressive.
With that said, I’ve been gradually extending SmartThings with Tasker, IFTTT and the like so that “helpful” things happen while the system doesn’t get in the way and doesn’t require a change in anybody’s routine. Lights come on when we arrive and during sunset, turn off automatically in different areas, we get announcements about inclement weather (plus weather forecasts), etc.
The one absolute destroyer of wife / spouse / family / whatever acceptance factor though is lack of reliability. The front porch lights once turned on NINE minutes after we arrived, and the Android presence reporting got so bad that I just removed it altogether and worked around it with Tasker and SharpTools.
I think there’s potential in the whole system, without it being disruptive, but the acceptance factor is only going to be high as long as things actually work without issue, 100% of the time.