Good questions! The answers are a little complicated, but if you start with the community beginners FAQ, I think it will help:
SmartThings Beginner’s Guide (2019)
In addition, try the community How-To on complex logic rules. I think it will answer your questions about delays and that type of thing. 
How to Get Started Creating Complex Rules in SmartThings (2017) (SmartThings Classic)
As far as where to ask questions, if you are using the official features, ask in the following section of the forum:
https://community.smartthings.com/c/smartapps/automation-ideas
If you are using webcore (essentially a scripting language for smartthings which you will read about in the complex rules how to), they have their own forum. (Again, details in the complex rules how to.)