I have been reading through the forums for a while now. I see many people wanting to control their ceiling fans and are looking for ways to do that. I am wondering if a different route will work, I have three ceiling fans that already have remotes. I am wondering if there is some type of z-wave remote that can learn those commands (there is only 4 buttons) and also be controlled through home automation, So the remote we be on the wall and able to control the fan locally but all over the internet. I see lots of z-wave remotes but the seems designed to control z-wave switches.
no that learning device does not exist. The answers are in the other threads you have been reading.
This approach would handle the need. Some have attempted this “learning device” with a Rasberry Pi without success. One of the issues with an “off the shelf” device (among others) is FCC certification is needed since it transmits a radio signal.
Ultimately, the fan needs to handle ZigBee or Z-Wave or whatever emerging Home Automation protocol.
Or you stick with a dumb fan w/o remote and a smart switch 
I guess what confuses me is products like Tado. I bought for my mini split and it basically just learned the remote codes. So how did Tado get around FCC stuff but nobody else can?
Agreed, it is frustrating. AC uses Infrared which is not regulated but requires line of sight.
It is definitely possible to do what you suggest, but I suspect the cost and market constraints are just too big for someone to provide it.